Since Nikki, founder of Celestial Soul (formally Fit & Fabulous) was 15 life has been quite a journey. At the worst point with 2 young children, she was suicidal and admitted to The Priory for 9 months on day care. Diagnosed with PTSD, anxiety, Bipolar 2 and OCD.
In the years then she has healed herself and built a successful business, incredible marriage and learned to navigate raising her children whilst finding herself truest, happiest self
She has helped countless women build their confidence and find themselves as they enter new phases of life and are ready to step in to their true potential.
Nikki has created informational programs to take women that are ready to move from feeling stuck, unhappy, disconnected, and lacking confidence and direction. To empowered, confident action takers owning their lives and feeling amazing.
She combines tools she’s learned from her own journey and experience from coaching women for 10 years, from all walks of life. Plus holistic healing therapies such as Reiki. Yoga, personal training and nutritional coaching.
She is on a mission to show you too, that you can become the woman you dream of being.
In her talk Hope & Freedom, Nikki uses her story of healing from trauma, overcoming a breakdown and mental illness building a successful business and raising a young family. All whilst keeping her marriage together, to inspire others that anything is possible when you work on yourself and don’t give up on your dreams.
Nikki has this to say about her story….
Long story short: After being raped at 15 I struggled for years in silence having been to scared to tell anyone. Fighting PTSD, OCD, Anxiety and Depression. Especially after the birth of my first child. After his traumatic birth I struggled with post-natal depression not realizing until later on the link between a traumatic birth and sexual assault. I was able to go some way to heal this when I trained as a Doula and with the birth of my second child, had a beautiful home birth in a pool supported by my husband and son, which was so cathartic for us all.
A few years later due to a MASSIVE twist of events that only fate could have arranged, I was forced to admit to my husband and family what had happened to me as a teenager. I had lived years of lies and half-truths. I was seen as the troublesome teen when I was just struggling to deal with sexual trauma. There was nowhere to run anymore. I had to speak my truth.
Following that twist of fate which I go in to during my talk, I quickly became suicidal. One day when at home with my then 1 & 3 year olds, playing in another room I snapped. I don’t know what happened but when I came back in the room I had managed some serious damage. The anger and torture inside was too much. I knew in that moment, if I didn’t call the Doctor I wouldn’t be alive when my husband came home that night. I called my GP. I don’t remember what I said it was a blurr for the next few hrs but I was in his doctors office within 15 minutes. I remember telling my husband I’d been to see them and then the next day being in the Priory.
It would be too long a story to say here the thoughts, feelings and terror that came along with my inevitable confession to my parents, even at 35 years old! I felt I was telling the people I loved the most I was a huge liar. My life was a big fat lie. Telling my parents was the single scariest thing I have ever done. Or I think will ever have to do. In my mind it had built up so much over 15 years that not much could compare to that. I knew it would cause them hurt and upset too. I under stood this more than anything now, being a mother myself.
On admission to the Priory I was diagnosed with PTSD, Bipolar 2, and anxiety. I thought at the time a quick appointment might fix me but I ended up with 9 months day care that ultimately saved my life. Followed by several years further personal development work and learning to accept what had happened which ultimately lead me to helping so many women now. For this I am blessed.
In my period of recovery I re-trained as a Personal trainer – it was a good distraction and I noticed the massive benefits that taking care of your well-being has on mental health. Fit & Fabulous was born and I ran the company very successfully for 10 years until we recently transitioned to Celestial Soul.
As I grew so did my business and we offer a more holistic approach to healing and personal transformation than just exercise and nutrition. Fundamentally I believe transformation has to start with the mind and heart.
It took great strength, courage, acceptance, hard work, a will to keep living and quite honestly plain pig stubbornness at times, not to let my perpetrator win.
That experience would never beat me. I refused to give up when I can tell you now, some days all I did was fantasize about how good it would feel not to take my life, and how much of a relief, it I so very wrongly thought it would be for those I loved around me.
All I saw at the time was the amount of pain I caused my husband and family. My marriage suffered massively. He suffered massively. It was heart breaking so know how I was feeling caused him so much hurt. My children suffered having a mother that wasn’t coping well. He picked up my slack.
He was my rock, guardian, incredible father and saviour. I’ll be forever grateful he stuck around when many men would have run a mile.
I didn’t dare imagine for one second back then I could have the marriage, clarity of mind, happiness and relationships with my family that I have now and I want to show as many people as possible hoe to have that too.
There are many facets and themes to my story that echo through many people’s lives that make it a relative talk for many events.
What we feel we feel.
That deserves honouring in order to find acceptance and ultimately heal ourselves. We have to witness those emotions before we can accept what happens to us and start a path to wellness and fulfilment.
I realized a long time ago that my story is something that can help people and inspire people.
I know I lived this experience, so I could help others discover that even in the most difficult of times there is a way to find complete happiness again. To find your truest self and life’s purpose.
I’m available to speak at various events and share my story and the positive message that followed.
I used to say if I can help one person suffering similar challenges it would be worth the sadness we have experienced.
I know that is NOT the truth. It’s NOT enough. I want to spread my message to AS MANY people as possible.
My story covers the following themes and I can tailor the message to suit the environment and event:
- Marriage and intimacy issues.
- OCD, Stress, anxiety and depression
- Well-being, health and fitness and Nutrition
- Being a mother and managing business
- Healing yourself and acceptance
- Over coming trauma of any kind
- Creating a business
- Personal Development being key to success
- Sexual trauma